Family Dynamics

As grandparents, what are our responsibilities?
 
I have three children, and distributed among my three children are five grandchildren. The homes they are growing up in are different; fortunately, the one thing they all have in common is that they are loved by all of their parents and most certainly by all of their grandparents. What I should be doing as a “good” grandparent is something that I think about probably too often. There is nothing that I enjoy more than spending time with my grandchildren, reading to them, playing with them, loving them. Each one of my grandchildren is an individual, with different interests and different needs. My granddaughters love to come with me to have their nails done – and I love to take them. It’s a treat for all of us. One of my granddaughters is autistic and I’ve learned that in order to have a “good day” with her, it’s important to have our time together be well planned and discussed in advance. She, however, has a twin sister who loves spontaneity and surprises. It’s fun to come up with new ideas and unique experiences to share with her. Seeing her exuberance and hearing her laughter is more than worth the effort that went into creating the experience. One grandson enjoys doing puzzles, another likes to play games and the youngest, only two years old, seems to be fascinated with cars, much like his father was at his age.
 
I’m not certain what, exactly, my job is as a grandmother. I can offer help when it’s wanted. I can listen sympathetically to problems – even when they’re complaining about their own parents (being careful never to undermine Mommy’s and Daddy’s wishes), but most of all I can love them unconditionally. The way I treat my role as a grandmother is very much the way my grandparents treated me and the way my parents and in-laws treated my own children. I would love to hear from other people to learn what they envision a grandparent’s role to be. I invite you to send us your thoughts.
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